📚 60 Book Recommendations, 3 Free Audiobooks, and more.

A&B #260

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📚 Books Summary:

This week's book is “The Fine Art of Small Talk” by Debra Fine (part 2).

Here are 3 new lessons from the book:

📖

1) How To Become An Amazing Listener

To become an amazing listener, you need to listen visually, verbally, and mentally.

Here's how:

Visually: Maintain eye contact, lean forward, open your arms and body, face the speaker, nod, and smile as they talk. Avoid covering your mouth, fiddling with jewelry or accessories, tapping or pacing, or glancing away from the speaker.

Verbally: Say things like: "That's amazing, tell me more," or "How interesting, what happened afterward?" Avoid staying silent for long periods of time because they might view it as you being bored, confused, or uninterested.

Mentally: Pay attention to the details of the conversation (people's names, important events, and other key information). Avoid yawning, faking interest, or being rude (see lesson #3 for how to exit a boring conversation).

Build these 3 traits and you'll become an awesome listener and someone people love to talk to.

📖

2) Match Their Level of Intimacy 

Building a new friendship requires openness and trust, but you want to avoid moving too quickly into the deep end.

If a stranger came up to you and started sharing their life story and deepest secrets, you'd feel uncomfortable and likely find an excuse to exit the conversation.

That's why you want to proceed in layers and match their level of intimacy.

Sharing personal details about your life helps build trust with someone new, but you should only disclose information about yourself that is comfortable and uncontroversial.

As a general rule, here are a few topics to avoid: Gossiping about friends or colleagues Sharing major personal misfortunes (divorce, accidents, etc.)

Controversial subjects such as religion or politics, talking about your personal health, or asking about theirs.

If you're unsure about a topic, follow the old axiom: When in doubt, leave it out.

📖

3) How To Gracefully Exit A Conversation

If you ever find yourself stuck in a boring or extended conversation, here are a few exit lines that will help you escape: "

  • “Excuse me, but I have to go find my coworker/friend."

  • "Have you met any interesting people here today? Would you mind introducing me to them?"

  • "Let's go meet the speaker."

  • "I see my friend Jennifer is here. I should go say hi."

  • "It was great talking with you, but I don't want to take up too much of your time."

Always try to end the conversation the same way you started it, on a positive note and with a smile and a handshake.

If you do this, you'll make a lasting impression and have made a new connection.

Actionable Advice

1) When you're in a conversation, remember to listen:

  • Visually: Face them and keep your body open.

  • Verbally: Ask questions to show you're listening.

  • Mentally: Pay attention to important details mentioned in conversation.

2) Avoid:

  • Gossipping

  • Sharing too many personal details

  • Talking about controversial subjects

  • Talking about your personal health or theirs

3) Do your best to exit a conversation gracefully:

  • Remember to end the conversation on a positive note with a smile and a handshake.

💎 Weekly Gem:

3 Amazing Audiobooks You Can Listen To For Free (Legally):

This is one of the best business books I’ve ever read. It’s super simple to understand yet packed with insights and actionable advice to help you grow your business.

Rory & AJ Vaden are the founders of Brand Builders Group– a personal brand strategy firm that has helped thousands of people start, grow, and monetize their personal brand. If you want to become wealthy and well-known online, this book is for you.

This is Hormozi’s most recent book. It broke the world record and is the fastest-selling nonfiction book of all time, with 3 million books sold in 24 hours. It will teach you how to make more money from your current business.

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