📚 75+ Books recs from a billionaire, psychologist, and content creator.

A&B #201

July 28, 2024

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👋 Hey everyone,

Last month I put together a list of the 100 most impactful books I’ve ever read.

But in case you want even more book recs, here are some from a billionaire, a psychologist, and a content creator:

PS: If you’re in NYC I’m hosting a reading event this Tuesday (July 30th). Come by to do some reading, hang out, and meet new people!

📚 Book Summary:

This week’s book is “Thoughts & Feelings” by Matthew McKay PhD.

It’s a cognitive workbook that’s fantastic for anyone who wants to change their limited thinking, stop self-sabotaging patterns of thinking, overcome feelings of depression, and take control of their mood and life.

I shared 3 lessons from this book previously, but it had one powerful lesson that I felt I had to share so I’m dedicating this newsletter to it, enjoy!

📖

1) How To Rewrite Your Negative Memories Into Positive Ones

We like to think that memories are permanent, but psychologically speaking, this isn’t true.

There’s a technique called inner-child visualization that uses visualization to restructure your memories. It can be used to alter negative beliefs, reduce depression, and relieve feelings of shame or guilt.

This technique works because your unconscious mind isn’t able to distinguish between actual experiences and dreams or fantasies.

To your unconscious mind, things that happened when you were ten years old can feel the same as things that happened to you ten hours ago.

To do this, visualize yourself, a wise, experienced adult, meeting with yourself as a child during a hard time. Try to think of a specific event that was traumatic or highly emotional for you.

Next, visualize yourself having a conversation with them. Try to be the friend that you needed at the time but didn’t have. And try to counter the negative belief that was formed with a more positive experience.

The good advice and support that you give your inner child in your imagination, years after the event, can still be processed, stored, and used by your unconscious just as if you had received it at the time of the trauma in question.

The fact that you have two contradictory versions of the same memory doesn’t bother your unconscious because it doesn’t insist on the kind of logic that your conscious mind requires.

Note: If you were physically, sexually, or emotionally abused as a child, you should consult with a mental health professional before doing inner-child work.

📖

2) How To Apply Inner-Child Visualization

Start by lying on your back with your legs and arms uncrossed on a couch or bed.

Next close your eyes and relax your body.

Now imagine the scene of the emotional event.

Relive the painful memory, first by watching the scene unfold from the point of view of your adult self.

At the end of the scene, walk up to your younger self and share a positive statement that you wish someone had told you.

Such as:

  • I love you.

  • It’s okay to cry.

  • It’s not your fault.

  • It’s okay to be sad.

Then try to have a conversation with your inner child. Be compassionate and offer an explanation for the painful event. Say the things you wish someone told you when you were going through that difficult experience.

Then, relive the scene again but from the point of view of your inner child.

Feel all of the old painful feelings but imagine all of the help and support of your adult self at the end of the scene.

Lastly, relive the scene once again from the point of view of your inner child, but with the knowledge and wisdom of your adult self.

This time, imagine how you would react and respond to the event differently than you did in the actual event.

When you’re ready, end the visualization and congratulate yourself for creating a new ending to an old memory.

Although this sounds a little woo-woo, I’ve tried it and it did make the negative event less serious.

Give it a try and let me know how it goes.

✅ Actionable Advice:

1) Use inner-child visualization to alter negative memories from the past:

  • Lie down on the couch, relax your body, and close your eyes.

  • Visualize an emotional event from your past.

  • Relive the painful memory from the POV of your present self.

  • Then walk up to your inner child and have a conversation with them and be the person you wished you had.

  • Next relive the event from the POV of your inner child.

  • Relive all of the old painful feelings but have a conversation with your adult self at the end.

  • Lastly, relive the event again from the POV of your inner child but with the wisdom you have today.

  • Imagine how you would react and respond to the event differently.

  • Open your eyes and congratulate yourself on crafting a new alternative to an old memory.

💎 Weekly Gem:

My friend and bestselling author of “Limitless” Jim Kwik is hosting a free 3-day learning summit.

I’m looking forward to day 3 of his event where he’ll be sharing reading tips on how to read faster and retain more of what you read.

There will also be awesome speakers like BJ Fogg (author of “Tiny Habits”) and Caroline Leaf (author of “Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess”).

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Thank you for your support, read on everyone!

-Alex W.

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